7.13.2011

Things that have happened

1. Greg and I purchased a home! We actually are suppose to move in this Friday. The house still needs a lot of work. We will be move our things to the new house, but living in a neighbors house we will be house sitting. I think Im going to miss my apartment. Greg wont, but I will. Although I'm really excited to have my own project room and enough closet space.

Last night my parents came over to help pack. Apparently I have alot of shoes. How many pairs of shoes is normal? How much is too much?

2. I went to Australia! I had an 11 hour layover in LA where I was able to visit with my sister. We went to the LA MOCA. In Australia I saw my best friend, who I haven't seen in about a year. He met me in Melbourne, which is an awesome city. Australia was the first country I've been to where English is spoken, this made it seem like an odd dream. Like I was asleep and my mind created a dream city, put my best friend there, everything seems normal but then there are some weird quirks here and there. We did A LOT of shopping! We went to the National Gallery of Victoria and saw Vienna: Art & Design. Ate a lot. Went to a Lego Exhibit. Saw a band called Graveyard Train, very Tom Waits. I kept thinking they were named Gravy train. We then traveled to Brisbane were my friend lives and goes to school. I HELD A KOALA!!!!!!!!!!!!! I also decided that my favorite Australian animal is the platypus, they are so playful! Saw a band in hipsters basements. Shopped and ate more. Went to the Surrealism exhibit in the GOMA which was unbelievable. They had a computer hall with a wonderful interactive element to the exhibition. I really want to work in a museum like that some day. Chocolate, Chocolate,Chocolate!Also Thomas (best friend) and I found 2 bags of cocaine in a ficus tree.

I'm home now, jet lag problems.

3. Upon my return I've lost 5 lbs, and I'm sure its all muscle. Before my trip I was going to a crossfit gym 3x a week. I was finally caught up with the rest of the females in my class. Today will be my first day back to the gym. I'm nervous but luckily its a ok day to return. I dont think I will ever be "skinny". Its just not in my build, even if I stopped eating I have a pretty wide frame. Also my body builds muscle really well. I would like to lose 25lbs, although at this point I'm not totally sure how to do that. I will just keep going to the gym and eventually it will just happen.

Ive had a lot of bad experiences with physical activity in the past. There are reasons why I thought I couldn't be "good" at physical activity. Like, running with the cross country team and being left behind in a trail run. Or never getting to play on my lacrosse team. Now I'm not competing with anyone but myself. Yes I want better times and want to finish with the rest of my class but it's not so much about that. Its about knowing I can do it and pushing to the very end. Its nice not to be on a "team", but instead in a "class".

4. Greg broke his finger in a terrible way, he may never rock climb again. SAD! But its ok he needs to rest it, focus on cycling and maybe in a few years...

I think that's all of the updates.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/lampwik/


M.E.T

4.18.11

Its slowly but surely becoming spring here in Utah. Our spring usually includes a lot of awkward snow, people forget that fact but its true. On the last day of June I will be on my way to Australia. My ticket was purchased months ago and now I just need to wait. Im really excited! Not so much because of the place but because I will be seeing my best friend in the whole world. It would've been a year since I last saw him. The excitement of seeing him and the realization of turning 25 in July has started me on a whirlwind of self improvement. Its as if I can clearly see who I want to be and the path there.

Here is my list of things Im doing and a final goal.

1) House hunting = Purchase a house by the end of the summer. Prefrably a older house we can make our own that is in salt lake city proper.

2) Returning to school = Enrolled in classes this fall semester at the Uof U, on a path to get my degree.

3) Cultivating friendships = Have a strong long lasting relationships

4) I've recently replaced my weekly dance class and rock climbing with going to a cross fit gym with some of my male friends. I realized that I would have to make a greater effort for my fitness/ weight goal. Now that its my own choice to work out and not a team or high school gym, I really like to work out. ALOT. = lose 20lb by Australia. Have a good muscle base to rock climb much better. To be confident in this swimming suit.



5) Saving = Continue good habits FOREVER

I haven't been work on my artwork as much. If Im not actively working on one of these things, then I'm brain dead. I need to push myself a little harder to be active all the time. Next step.

M.E.T

Becoming Bert

Sesame street is something that is deeply printed onto my character. During the episode of Cake Boss where he makes a cake for the 40th Anniversary of Sesame Street. He gets to delivery the cake to the set, TO SESAME STREET. I bawled. I cried during most of the episode. If I ever get cancer Im going to wish for a sleepover on sesame street, BUT NO ELMO OR ABBYCADABBY


Growing up my favorite character was Ernie. I thought everything he did was hilarious, I basically wanted to be Ernie, he was a prankster who did whatever he pleased. A couple years ago I went on a PBS binge. For once in years I had a working TV. I was working on a big freelance project that required me to work long hours in my cold apartment. I began to watch a lot of Sesame Street to mediate the strain. I relished whenever a Burt and Ernie segment would come on. I would stop, physically turn around and watch. Something odd happened while I was watching. Here I was a young adult struggling to make ends meet. Forcing myself to work when it was the last thing I wanted to do, especially since my bed was so close and the only warm place. I had negative money and was learning the hard lesson of graduating to an adult. My ray of sunshine was Sesame Street but as I watched Ernie all I could think was.

"What a selfish asshole."

I put myself into the place of Burt. All I do is try to be nice, share and this rude roommate is always out to drink my beverage. This guy is always scheming to get more then his fair share. This jerk probably doesn't have to get up in the morning to go to work but makes sure I cant get to sleep. I had a new found appreciation for Burt. I was becoming him. Responsible, Quirky, Focused Interest, Thoughtful an Adult.

Recently while celebrating a friends birthday at a bar this topic was brought up. One friend stated that Burt was a weirdo who liked pigeons, Ernie was WAY better. I was appalled, but then it made sense. The truth is shes a bit spoiled and she has never lacked in the way most people including myself have. I realized that anyone who cant really see and appreciate Burt was not a true adult. Its easy to love the fun things, the pranksters. Its so much more difficult to love one (or oneself) with all the quirks and practicality. Sort of like your parents. As an adult sometimes I have to make good decisions instead of the fun ones in order to maintain a long term happiness, or good long term relationship with others.

As an adult I had the epiphany that well, I sort of sucked in comparison to others. I'm flawed, but those flaws are what make me different from others and make me, me. I still like Ernie as a character, sometimes he makes me want to hug myself. Burt, is more like me we like what we like and sometimes we have to be the unpopular word of reason. PLUS Burts got be a saint to allow Ernie to be his roommate. Seriously.

M.E.T

2.18.11

I understand why marriage is hard now. Its like you know that as a person you have a lot of shitty components but in general people dont want to get into that bucket of worms. Once your married its like you've signed a contract for all of those things to be pointed at and brought to the light.

Sucks.

1.19.11

Many of my previous post have been about my struggle with what I perceive are the flaw of my body.


As of late I have began to rock climb again. This time around I've dedcided to have a more constructive mindset. Previously, whenever I failed a problem (climbing route) I became really embarrased and insecure because everyone else was better then me. I guess I thought that everyone would think less of me? This time around I continued to tell myself that it didn't matter how many problems I compeleted in one day, instead I just need to climb as much as possible so that I can build the needed muscle. Ive cultivated a healthy relationship with falling, instead of condemning myself for doing so. Sometimes I'm still embarrassed and I dont want to climb anymore, which is also ok. I dont have to feel guilty for giving up, I bring my running stuff and run instead. Climbing has become something I want to do, instead of a reminder of what I dont like about myself.

This overall mindset shift has helped me re-evaluate my body. I also started taking a modern dance class with a friend. I'm trying to find the right Yoga class to take. Also I took my bike out for a winter spin. I suddenly have a lot less negative things to think about myself.

Sometimes going to the gym makes you feel bad about yourself because everyone else is so pumped! Other times it makes you feel really great because well, everyones got issues. I really dont like my big belly and my chunky back, but that's really it. I have awesome legs, a really cute firm bum (really). My arms are fine. Everything is normal, and its good and it works.