12.23.09

Greg's mother and I have a very awkward relationship. We are on opposite ends of the spectrum, as far as the type of women we are. I like her, she likes me but our ideas and opinions are hard for the other person to relate to or even understand. This year for her Christmas gift I've decided to paint a watercolor of her and Greg's father. Greg's father passed away about 10 years ago. This year Greg's sisters-in-law made a book about Greg's father Paul, for all incoming grandkids. I thought that painting Paul for her would add to the effort of remembering him. I never knew him but I still get sad about it. Once I was going through a family album and I found a letter he wrote after he recovered but before he got sick again. The letter was about his hope for his family, and that he was so thankful that he got to spend alittle more time with his family. I cried, although we never knew each other I know he would of loved me like family. I cant help but love him like family. Does that make sense? Is that just weird?

One day while we were at my parents house we were talking about crying. They were saying how Im a huge crier (?), and how I've never seen my dad cry. Then my mother asked if his dad ever cried. Greg's response was,

"Yea, he cried alot at the end"

That makes me sad, my mind is like a television. When people say things I see it, when he said that I saw this person I care about crying because he was sick and knew he wouldn't get to see his family grow, I began to cry. Everyone got quiet and even my brother got all teary eyed. Then seeing as I was crying again I said,

"I guess I do cry alot."

I think about his dad and I feel like I know him, even if its just a little. I like to think that we would be friends and he would like my craziness and be able to understand me. I am really excited to paint him and his wife. I hope she likes it and takes it as serious as Im taking it, Im sure she will.

M.E.T.